Dear Marilyn,
My mother has Alzheimer’s disease and is getting more and more difficult. She moved in with our family when she was first diagnosed and we thought that between my sister and I we could care for her without having to have her go to a nursing home. Just last week in a fit of temper, she ripped up the power of attorney that she had signed. In her lucid moments she tries to get us to promise that we won’t put her away and tells us that she will fight to be kept at home. She visited her aunt in a home years ago and had a bad feeling about the home. I think that some homes are better than the old days and I am at my wit’s end. How can I arrange for her to be admitted? —Marian, Encinitas


Dear Marian,
Alzheimer’s Disease is a problem which is occurring more and more in our society as our population ages and family cannot always provide care for senior members. You do not say anything about your mother’s assets and so I will assume that it is not possible to hire several caregivers to provide 24 hour care for your mother in a home setting. There are homes which provide for persons who have this disease and are quite nice and have a variety of activities for the patients. On one of your mom’s “good” days you may want to visit one.

Your mother cannot be forced into a nursing home against her will unless you or another person gets a court order that gives you a conservatorship over her person. The order must state that she is mentally or physically incompetent and that residential care is in her best interest. Otherwise she cannot be forced to go against her will.

Prior to making such an order several steps must be taken: Your mother’ s doctors will be asked to submit papers which attest to her medical history. Next an investigator from the county will “check out her particular situation” and make a report to the court. The Judge will talk with her and since this will be a contested matter will appoint an attorney to represent her. Her attorney will try to ascertain what her wishes are if she is unable to tell the attorney.

It would have been a helpful document that, if she while still competent, had executed a nomination of conservatorship designating whom she wished to care for her should she ever become incompetent.

There is also another type of conservatorship which lets someone else be in charge of another’s money; it is called a conservatorship of your estate. There are other options which you may want to discuss with an Attorney who specializes in this area.